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Showing posts from October, 2013

To say what I can't

It's 4:18 a.m. and I cannot sleep. My eyes are swollen. My head just starts screaming on it's own. I want to write this for myself. Writing has always helped me before and I thought if I won't write down something....anything that is going on in my head then I would never be able to move on(?) I don't know. I never thought I would have to use this word. For few seconds I think what am I even bothered about? Million people go through break ups. People hurt, grow out of it and learn from their experience. Hell, this is just a break up. People go through so many severe losses. In my own country people are dying of terrorism, hunger, communal violence, civil wars and what the fucking fuck am I crying about! 
But I just can't get myself to dilute my own problem. First of all, I don't blame him. Nor do I blame myself. It's too painful to recount all the amazing moments I had with him throughout my year long relationship, but I do cherish them and will for the re…